but whatever, no need to make tumblr all about emotions.
currently i’m trying to finish my college app for texas and macaulay. hoorah! and i keep on forgetting that tomorrow is my birthday, but that seems to be the case every year for some reason. I have to admit, i didn’t like Niagara falls trip. In fact, if it weren’t for one person, i think i’d really hate it. I liked Howes Caverns and the night stop at Rochester. The hotel at Rochester was quite nice. :) The food court was probably the strangest, eeriest place i’ve ever been to. All in all it was an okay trip. Learned many things most definitely.
Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
I wish I had magical powers to make you happier. You should give yourself more credit.
Stop fretting over the smallest, most insignificant things, don’t doubt yourself, you can do it.
I know there’s a lot more to you than what you show. I think I know more than you think I know.
Please be more genuine, true to us, true to yourself.
Please admit to your faults, it’ll be better for everybody. Accept imperfection, i think once you do, everything will be as easy as your pretend it is.. everything will be as perfect as you want it to be. we love you very much.
i love you. i hope for the best.
you try so hard… but it looks so pathetic. the better you is what you hide.
no pity, it’s my mistake too and it’s a terrible one.
i hate the fact that you’re still on my mind
thank you for all your guidance.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
My name is Yuliya Kim. I don’t really like my name because i don’t think it’s so catchy. heh. I just don’t like it, but i’m okay with it… sort of.
I’m korean-american-uzbek-russian whatever else, i’m not sure. I’m a mix of everything i have a love/hate relationship with this because of many reasons. i love it because i know it’s pretty unique and strange, i love to go against the stereotype. i think this shaped my outlook on life and my characteristics in general. i kind of really don’t like it.. a lot of the times.
i’m not a movie person but sort of am.
i’m not very decisive, i dislike shopping too.
i asked my dad to buy me a guitar for my 13th? 12th? birthday, i’m not sure. I wanted to sing and play the guitar just like Emma Roberts from Unfabulous. I though she was so cool because she could play, sing, and make songs. hahah i wanted to be like her so i taught myself guitar… and i suck now anyways. wish i actually learned properly.
i like to daydream and analyze a lot. i love to analyze people, emotions, society.. idk why.
i’m the youngest child which explains a lot.
i want a lot of things but when i’m asked what i want i say i don’t want anything.. which is true because the things i want cannot be bought.
i like learning. it actually makes me very happy. unfortunately, i’m not a genius. would have been great to be one :(
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
i usually don’t like these kinds of questions because i don’t really know but whatever. there’s no order to this, but i guess if you’re like my dad, i’ll like you. if you are street smart. i think this quality is very much essential in a man. since a man has to work, he has to know the ins and outs of the corruption in society. if he is street smart, he’ll survive, and so will i. heh
one who is humorous and can light up the room but does not depend on this to get by. one who is also serious when needed.
smart. nobody wants a person who can’t follow your conversation.
a man of God is a respected one.
confident and goal oriented.
courageous and adventurous. this does not mean that he doesn’t have fears but rather that he is willing to step into the uncertainty, do the things he may be afraid of, step up for his beliefs.
honest and good willed.
strong. in every way possible. strong but very soft on the inside. somebody who can dg a well, make a fire, build a house by hands, deal with gangsters and be respected by them but not be a gangster himself, stand up to the general even if he is fresh in the army, be supah sly like a ninja, and fix anything that’s wrong in the house or in the car. hahaha these are just the little things my dad is, but i don’t think anybody can really be like him. he’s just… yeah.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
God and Christianity
college apps and life
what i think about the world
my friends and society
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
quit gymnastics, tennis, dance, piano, ballet, guitar, like 3 other dance schools….
think i wasn’t good enough for something and so therefore didn’t do them
wish i weren’t so emotional
i think i’m done with this list. no regrets friends!
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Family, if i were to put all of them it would take up all of the numbers. Papa, mama, zhenya, sasha. and all my grandparents
Daisy Kim, my best best best friend.
Danny Yi, <3
Monica Kim, my kimmie
God doesn’t count as a person, but ya know.
Day Seven: Four turn offs.
inability to play sports or do active things
lack of confidence.
being stupid, not silly, but like not smart.
Day Eight: Three turn ons.
man of God
Day Nine: Two smileys that describe your life right now.
Day Ten: One confession
i have many many many fears i’d rather not show. i am scared of too many things.
Here it is.. the start of a very uncertain journey. Lord, You do what You know is best for me. Please just help me to yield to You wisdom and Guidance because I do have the arrogant tendency to think my way is superior. May You be glorified through my failures and successes, from my small deeds to large. Whatever I do may it be done to glorify You.
Even though there are so many things to do, so many deadlines, so much pressure, I’m so blessed to have such amazing people around me. I’m sure that this brief elation is only brief, but this feeling of happiness and satisfaction despite the uncertainty and overwhelming stress will be unforgettable. I hope to carve it in my heart and mind as a constant reminder that I am truly blessed. Thank You for everything and thank you guys for simply being here with me. There are so many people in our lives that we bump into, mindlessly or intentionally, whether or not they seem significant, they somehow alter the direction of our path. Each individual has the power to tweak the mood, navigate your thought, consider your action and so on. How amazing this is; that even on the days that i feel like absolute worthless crap, the people in my life can curve the lines of my lips into a smile. I have an awesome loving family, great group of friends, and a wonderful significant other.